Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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