woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize
