Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
