You're so nebulous sometimes
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize