I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
