So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
you had me at cake vodka
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
