So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
