using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Randomize
