thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
We need to rekindle our bromance
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I just found puke in my bra..
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
