So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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