Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
