Me too!
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
