The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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