And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
