good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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