I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
