Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize