He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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