Its about making memories worth repressing
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
