my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize