i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
