If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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