I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
