you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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