do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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