his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
bring money and cleavage
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
