i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
