I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
