Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
