everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
