how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
