Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
