the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
