Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
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