I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize