i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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