Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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