Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
he thought i was a dude.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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