went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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