new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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