Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Randomize
