my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
