At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Two words: nipple clamps
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