just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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