I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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