Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
