Ambien. No doubt about it.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Use "feeling words"
Yay
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize