Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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