and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Im part way to drunk.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
