Nicole vs. Life
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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