his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
