I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
